


Goodbye Until Tomorrow...

by orphan_account



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Character Death, Emotional Manipulation, Evil Uther Pendragon (Merlin), Forbidden Love, Heavy Angst, If You Squint - Freeform, Inspired by The Last Five Years, I’m sorry, M/M, POV Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Slight fluff, Song Lyrics, Uther Finds Out About Merlin's Magic (Merlin), but it’s okay, its sad, not really - Freeform, sort happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:40:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26880850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Arthur has a hard time knowing what love is, it always seemed to baffle others when it only took a new servant to show Arthur how beautiful love could be..or even dangerous...
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 55





	Goodbye Until Tomorrow...

**Author's Note:**

> i swear, i’m okay.

Arthur wasn’t one for much love or affection. He didn’t get it. His rude or “ _pratish_ ” ways we’re all he knew. One thing that pondered others minds was why did it take a simple servant boy to make Arthur see love could be everywhere, that compassion was a great power.

It always baffled Arthur to see Merlin so intimate with him, at night before retiring to bed on his own, Merlin would hold Arthur’s hands, rubbing his thumbs against the palms of the prince, bringing it to his cheek so he could nuzzle against the rough but tender hands that held a sword so beautifully.

Or in the mornings when Merlin would come right before sunrise, shuffle around, before getting into the bed with Arthur, only in one of Arthur’s old tunics he had told Merlin to throw away. He would cuddle up against the princes side, pressing the softest, cloud like kisses to any close exposed skin of Arthur.

When Arthur had asked why Merlin was always so touchy and compassionate, Merlin had simply said; “because i love you.”

It made the prince crazy how honest Merlin could be sometimes. Arthur gawked at him, he knew there were some who admired him, but Merlin? The one who practically hated him when they first met?

Merlin though, he had no care of what he said, only offered a sweet, correction, the sweetest smile in Camelot to Arthur before making his way towards him. Grasping the rough hands once again and pecking the corner of Arthur’s mouth.

Arthur couldn’t sleep that night until Merlin had come in and did his usual snuggle up. Arthur this time moved his body to press closer against Merlin, pressing the servant so close, smelling the soft dark hair that curled at the top, caressing his fingers against Merlin’s hip.

Merlin made a soft mewl at the touch of Arthur’s fingertips against his skin. Shifting slightly as his arms cling to the prince, rolling his hips to clash against Arthur’s. Needy and tired Merlin was his favorite now.

When Arthur found out Merlin was a sorcerer he felt betrayed, wanted to yell at him, but Merlin looked so fragile as well, shaking almost violently, his eyes pleaded and his voice was so broke. He muttered, rocking on the floor as he stared at the fire.

Arthur knew his father would have no mercy on the boy, would i fact throw Merlin’s face into the fire and hold him there until his lungs where filled with ash and smoke, but Arthur could never hurt Merlin, not ever again.

Much to his surprise he sat next to his lover, soothingly rubbing his back and leaning forward a bit to see any of the warlocks face. It made him jump when Merlin snapped his head up and jumped at Arthur, babbling apologies and such, like;

“please, i never meant to keep it from you”

“don’t let him kill me Arthur, i can’t-“

“i love you so much, i only used it for you.”

“i don’t want to lose you again, please i’m sorry.”

Arthur held him tightly too, burying his face into the thinner boys shoulder, a shaky breath coming out. Arthur used his other hand to pet Merlin’s hair, shaking his head before lifting it up and kissing him harshly.

“he will not take you away from me, Merlin. Never.”

The real question, the real hurtful thing that happened was how they got here?

How did Uther find out?

When Arthur got an urgent message from one of the other servants that he needed Arthur now, he got worried. Telling Merlin to wait for him as he rushed to the throne room. He didn’t except the following conversation.

Uther sitting furiously on the throne, his sword too close to be good. His eyes shot arrows of disappointment as Arthur entered. If Uther didn’t care of his reputation towards his son, he definitely would have killed Arthur. He practically snarled when Arthur came closer.

“courting a servant who has magic!? Are you listening to yourself boy! Do you know what kind of creature he is?”

Arthur wanted to punch his father, harder that it would knock him into the dungeons. Merlin wasn’t a creature, he was still very much human, always was.

“he’s not a creature father, he’s Merlin. My friend, my servant, my love. He’s saved my life, only uses magic for me!”

Uther roared with anger, ushering the other guards away. “i will not accept this thing to stay in the castle! He has to go, Arthur. Now!”

Arthur shook his head, his face serious and challenging. “he is staying father, as future king, i am ordering you to allow him to stay with me and maybe you’ll see how good he is!”

Uther looked like he was about to do another harsh speech or throw his sword through his son, but then the king smiled. It was evil, slimey, full of hatred. “you want to know what it takes to be king?” he nudged his foot against his sword, it slid across the tiled floor to Arthur’s feet.

“kill the boy.”

Arthur furrowed his eyebrows. “never.”

Uther smiled again. “fine Arthur, Merlin will just spend everyday, in my chambers, deliciously running his hands on me when he puts my clothes on, or maybe i could tie him to my bed and keep him like that for when i’ve had stressful days or arguments with a son like you.”

“keep your hands away from him, he’s not yours and he will not be dead!”

Uther laughed slightly, the ring of it sent chills through Arthur. “oh he will, i will torture him, everything i can and when he looks at you, he will see pain, knowing that you have to stand there and watch him suffer. Wouldn’t it be better if he died in the arms of someone he truly loved? admired? if not, i’d be more than happy to stab that thing in its side.”

Arthur painfully kept his hand in a fist, bending down to grasp the sword. “i- i will do it.”

“finally.”

Arthur waved him off, turning sharply as he left the throne room, he could feel that evil grin beam at the back of his head. He wouldn’t make himself cry. He couldn’t kill him, not Merlin. Never Merlin. The prince’s grip on the sword was so tight he felt that he could have broken it.

He didn’t realize that he was standing outside his chambers, looking at the door. He couldn’t do it, his heart painfully clenched, why? what was he feeling? Why couldn’t he kill him? Arthur never hesitated on the field, just because Merlin loved him doesn’t mean he should have this much trouble, right?

Arthur didn’t feel the small rain of tears come down his face. He softly clicked the bedroom door open. The blonde stumbled in, the cross-guard of his sword pressing against his hand harshly, certainly leaving a red mark.

He watched Merlin’s movement as he gracefully turned around towards him, his back against the open window, sun behind him as the wind blew his beautiful night dark hair. Merlin’s eyes lingered, looking down at the sword. The smile that had been there, surprisingly never left.

Arthur felt his face damp, soaked from his silent crying. He stalked closer to his lover, he wished for him to run, he wanted Merlin to use his magic.

**_‘DO SOMETHING YOU IDIOT!?’_ **

“Merlin..”

Merlin just smiled, pushing himself a little away from the window, when he saw the faint light hit his face he didn’t know he had started to cry himself.

“goodbye until tomorrow,”

Arthur shook his head, he wasn’t going to do this, he jumped when Merlin’s hand gripped his wrist, pulling the blonde closer, tears rapidly falling down their faces, Arthur couldn’t bare to see Merlin’s stupid happy smile.

“For i have been waiting, i have been waiting for you..”

Arthur gasped slightly, needing air almost, he felt the little shake in Merlin. He tried to pull him closer, but Merlin wouldn’t move. He only shushed Arthur, moving Arthur’s arm back.

Merlin gripped the tunic in Arthur’s shoulder, smiling. “Just close the gate, i’ll stand and wait, Arthur..” he smiled more painfully, his voice lost and broken, before he thrusted Arthur’s arm back towards him.

Arthur choked on a sob as he felt the sword pierce Merlin through. Merlin gripped him tighter, letting go of Arthur’s wrist, using his hand to caress the princes cheek. His breath went shallow, tears slowed as the warlock closed his eyes tightly, before opening them to look at Arthur one last time.

Arthur shook slightly, holding Merlin close, looking back at the warlock.

“ _goodbye_..”

They both said together, before Merlin went limp. The warlock fell against Arthur. Arthur sank onto the floor, pulling him closer and tighter, pulling the sword out and chucking it somewhere, cradling Merlin’s head he let out a roar or sob of some sort. He ignored the urgent rush of guards, that came in. Even the gasp that came from Gwen as she cried, Morgana holding her close for comfort.

He didn’t care that he could feel his fathers evil grin burning his head. Arthur still cried. His heart shattered, why didn’t Merlin stop him? Why didn’t Merlin say something else, why goodbye?

Arthur never got to tell him that he loved him. Why couldn’t he tell him before? Why was love so painful?

It didn’t matter that when Arthur became king, he legalized magic.

It didn’t matter that Arthur eventually married a beautiful princess while Morgana and Gwen were off being in love.

It didn’t matter that Arthur always wrapped Merlin’s neckerchief around his hands when he went out for battle.

Nothing mattered when the one person who dared to show compassion to the pratish and rude prince, was gone.

Even though it hurt, Arthur lived by his last words.

He would say goodbye until tomorrow, he would always remember the soft touches, sounds, the laugh, bright smile of him.

No matter how many times he felt happy though, Merlin limp in his arms and Uthers grin still would haunt him.

Arthur could no longer wait until tomorrow.

**Author's Note:**

> if you didn’t cry, i don’t blame you, my writing skills are questionable, but if you get the general idea and listen to Goodbye Until Tomorrow/I Could Never Rescue You from The Last Five Years, maybe you’ll cry like i did, idk. <3 :,)


End file.
